August 12, 2020

Great vacation last week with the family in California.  Been too long since we did something like that, just us.  MOm was with us which I think was great for her, it was certainly great for us.  I am so grateful for this family of mine.  We did some quality scripture study and I really see my kids trying to hear, to understand, and to think about what these things mean for the way they live their lives.

Reading in 1 Ne 20 and 21 today - a couple Isiah chapters.  Honest truth is that I am not yet sufficiently enlightened to get a lot out of them, but I still like to read them.  They sing, they are poetry, and every once in a while something sticks.  Today, it was out of Chapter 21, verses 23 and 25.  In 23 it says "for they shall not be ashamed that wait for me".  I wonder what that means.  I think the waiting here from my perspective is not as much waiting for his coming, though that may be the ultimate thing we have to wait for, but I think the hardest thing to wait for is understanding and knowledge - the clarity that vindicates those who believe.  The waiting that is hardest is for answers to the questions that are so, so hard to answer.  The hard stuff, like why do good people have to deal with so much bad luck?  Why did J.S. do some of the seemingly preposterous things he did?  Why do there seem to be contradictions between some church scripture and history?  Those are the things that, when confronted with them, it is hard not to feel ashamed when we must say, "I don't know, I'm waiting for clarity on that".  

Then again, waiting generally is a righteous endeavor.  I think many of the rewards we receive come after the trial of our faith, and I know no better trial of faith than to just wait, to quietly Wait.  I have watched my mom wait for some understanding of the rationale for the death of my father.  I've watched my wife wait for improvement in her emotional health while she works feverishly to do her part.  I think I can personally do a better job at p=quietly waiting.